Rodney Robbins
P. O. Box 792
Maiden, NC
28650-0792
Rodney@MyNewPlay.com
828-461-1306 EST
Posted by Rodney Robbins on May 16, 2009 in Books | Permalink | TrackBack (0)
Maybe sadness is our gate to understanding.
Maybe sadness teaches us a lesson--to trust, to endure, to reach out, to be in the moment, even in the saddest moments.
Maybe it's better if we don't run from the sadness.
Maybe it's better if we sit together with the sadness and comfort it, and let it comfort us.
Maybe the point of sadness is to pass through the sadness and come out the other side and say, "Ah, here is the world again!"
We know sadness is a real thing, a natural thing, an unpleasant.
Maybe, just maybe, it' s almost a good thing.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on October 27, 2009 in Current Affairs, Embrace the Pain, Good Questions, Grief, Religion, Rodney Robbins, Settling In | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)
Technorati Tags: Bad things, Muscular Dystrophy, Sadness, Sit with the sadness
Dark thinking. We've all had it. You almost can't help it when you live with chronic pain, a constantly sick stomach or fluctuating energy levels that go from the toilet to the tarmac. It's easy to just get mad and puke all over yourself, go along and agree with yourself that life sucks and then you die (after all, it's partly true). But there are two things you need to know.
One, your dark thinking may be trying to tell you something. You're not sleeping well. You did too much yesterday. You are not awake yet. You are hungry. You forgot your meds. So, listen to your dark thoughts, and see if they are saying anything important. Listen then admit to yourself, "I need more sleep. I'm going to take care of myself and go back to bed," or "I guess square dancing for two hours was a bit much. Next time I'll take better care of myself and dance an hour then watch an hour."
Two, your dark thinking may be full of crap. If you listen and all you here is "blah, blah, blah, you suck!" Talk back to those dark thoughts. Say, "I have no good reason to feel worse today than yesterday. The sun is shining. I'm not in a lot of pain, so shut up!" or maybe, "Yeah, it's one of those gloomy days, but I'm not going to listen to you moan and kvetch all frackin' day. Here's a pain killer now, Keep Quite or I'll take you out and whip you!"
The next time you notice dark thinking, try both of these approaches. One of them will usually work.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on October 22, 2009 | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Technorati Tags: Chronic Illness, Rational Emotional Therapy, Rodney Robbins
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Posted by Rodney Robbins on October 19, 2009 in Funny, Joy, Settling In | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Generosity isn't easy when you feel horrible. On the other hand, when you feel horrible, what else do you have to offer? As much as I whine and complain, one of the few things that has consistently helped me feel better, even when I'm at my worst, is to get outside my own little tornado, think about someone else, and do a little something for them. It's not always easy. Sometimes it hurts (not because being generous hurts, but because doing anything hurts), but afterward, I hurt a little less, and my spirit feels a little stronger.
Generous Questions
When I was at my worst (unable to work, even taking the census), I used to get so angry because I couldn't hold a job. Of course, I was doing SOME-thing all day, so why couldn't someone find value in something I was able to do? I finally had to accept that what I could offer was subtle: a kind word, a loving gesture, a little help with dishes, a smile to a stranger, sharing the remote control, a telephone call. We don't get paid for this stuff, but this type of generosity enriches our lives. Try it. Try just a little bit of it. See if it works for you.
PS
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Posted by Rodney Robbins on October 07, 2009 in Embrace the Pain, Forgiveness, Kindness | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Since I got out of prison (or what some other people call "high school"), I did okay academically. I graduated near the top of my class from two colleges, and most people who meet me would think I'm smart enough to come in out of the rain. Still, there has got to be more to life than trying to figure out how to live with Periodic Paralysis, Migraine headaches and Celiac Disease. It can't all be about trying Trying TRYING to be smarter than these darned demons that follow me around.
Heck, on a good day, I can barely keep up with the complex interaction of triggers and symptoms and weather and food and activity and sleep. Then, when I'm getting a migraine, getting over a migraine, going into a paralysis attack or coming out of an attack of weakness, or when I've accidentally poisoned myself with some hidden gluten, my brain turns to jello. During those spells, I can't remember so much as where I parked my motorcycle. Trying to keep everything else straight while walking and balancing sun glasses on my nose is out of the question.
I don't have the solution yet. But I do know that trying to hold everything in my head all at once doesn't work very well. Periodic Paralysis is just to hard to juggle.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on September 30, 2009 in Current Affairs, Periodic Paralysis, Rants, Rodney Robbins | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Technorati Tags: Big Feet, Big Love, Celiac Disease, Migraine, Periodic Paralysis, Rodney Robbins
Thinking errors. While they can lead you into trouble, they are also classic symptoms of depression, low blood sugar, hormone problems and fatigue. We feel bad, our brains try to create a rational explanation, and we end up with delusional thinking that makes a bad situation even worse.
Filtering means combing through your experiences and focusing exclusively on the BAD things that happen to you. When my potassium drops, sometimes I'll dig up bad things I did waaaay back in middle school. My mind replays these events and tells me, "See? You suck! You've always sucked? What a frackin' jerk you are!" Is it rational to worry about events from 20 years ago? Things that were not nice to do but that were typical of lots of nasty little middle schoolers? My rational mind says no, but when I already feel bad, my depressed mind says, yes.
I'm also prone to Discounting the Positive. In the real world, I may have had two weeks of productive work, but when I have two "nearly worthless" days of weakness, suddenly all those good times don't matter any more. My mind says, "Yeah right. Two weeks of being barely normal. Oooo, that's impressive!" In those 2 days, I may have actually done a fair amount of work (in between resting and resting some more), but suddenly that doesn't count. Neither do the weeks of productive time. Is that rational? No. Does it feel rational when it's happening? Yes.
The first step is to notice the fatigue, illness, flatness or depression. Then be aware that thinking errors are lurking near by. When you notice them, test them against reality. Talk back to them. Make those thoughts earn their keep. Ask yourself if you might really just need a bit of patience, a few extra hours of sleep or a good meal. Consider you may have missed a dose or your medication, or that you need a bit extra today. Don't roll over and let these errors steam roll your life. Fight back!
Got a story about talking back to your thinking errors? Use the "Comments" link below and tell us about it.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on September 24, 2009 in Current Affairs, Rants, Rodney Robbins | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Technorati Tags: Feeling Good, Mental mistakes, Mind games, Rodney Robbins, Thinking errors
Feeling stuck, trapped or backed into a corner by life's unreasonable demands? Maybe it's not all about your illness. Maybe you are just trapped by the role you assumed automatically in your (typically) dysfunctional family. Below are the common roles as outlined by Sharon Wegscheider-Cruse of the National Association of Children of Alcoholics. Of course, you don't need a drunken parent to have a tough childhood. There are all kinds of destructive family situation. We survive them, but sometimes the scars still show.
If you had a tough childhood and lived with alcohol parents or faced down other types of abuse and live with a chronic illness, your pain may be pain of the soul as well as the body. Learn to embrace yourself, even when you feel defective, damaged, rejected and lost. Read more about these family roles at RecoverIsSexy.com.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on September 09, 2009 in Embrace the Pain | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Technorati Tags: AA, Alcoholics, Chronic illness, Family structures, NACA, Rodney Robbins
"God made the world out of nothing, but sometimes the nothingness shows through."Paul Valery, French poet.
Use the comment link below to share your reactions.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on September 09, 2009 in Humor | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Technorati Tags: Chronic illness, God, Humor, Karma, Nothingness, Religion, Signlessness
Pay attention now because I'm going to make this fast: No problem is too big to ignore! Thank you. Please enjoy the after dinner refreshments.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on August 28, 2009 in Kindness | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)
Technorati Tags: Philosophy, Problem solving, Problems, Rodney Robbins
I went home for lunch today. Bright. Hot. Big puffy clouds. Nice motorcycle riding weather. On the way back to work, I noticed the clear blue sky in front of me, and the giant, dark clouds behind me. Sure enough, it started raining. Big drops that hit me with a cold splat! So, do I stop before I get too wet? Do I keep going and hope I can outrun the giant rain drops? I saw an empty carport by a fire station, swung in, pulled on my rain pants, hopped back on the bike and, wouldn't you know? The rain stopped! Sometimes that's all it takes to make me laugh.
Posted by Rodney Robbins on August 20, 2009 in Joy | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)