Whiners Need Not Apply

I used to work with a young woman, let's call her Jane. She didn't work directly for me, but every morning I'd walk by her station and she would smile a good morning. Sometimes we would talk about movies, but she never moaned and complained about the people she worked with. I can't remember ever hearing her fuss about her job (the pay wasn't great), moan about how hard it was (even on one of those days), bitch about how hot it was (even when the air conditioner was broken), or whine how so-and-so had done her wrong. I didn't realize how much I enjoyed her quite, smiling, no worries presence until she moved on. The new girl isn't a bad worker. It's just that  she is more like the rest of us: She spends at least 50% of her time complaining!

Everybody is good at something, and there are a lot of us who are good at complaining. A recent survey claims that most people spend half their waking hours bitching and moaning. Anyone who works has plenty to bitch and moan about: traffic, weather, short sighted bosses, absent coworkers, stupid people in general (a great all purpose complaint), plus our own aches, pains, cramps, nose bleeds, bashed fingers and on and on. Besides being boring as hell to us and everyone around us, this type of thinking is unproductive and wasteful. A little is fun. Sometimes everyone needs to vent. But enough already!

When I realized I could miss someone just because they smiled and didn't complain, I decided I needed a new saying to help me control my instinct to bitch and moan. You are welcome to try it yourself, if you want. Here it is:

Mustard is great on a hot dog, but even a little bit of mustard can ruin a lemon cake!

(Do I have to spell it out that "mustard" means complaining, "hot dogs" are times and places where everyone loves to bitch and moan, and "yellow cake" stands for good times, fun events and regular activities? I didn't think so.)

PS
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Comments

[Rodney]

Do I have to explain that "mustard" means whining and complaining? A little moaning about a bad call at a baseball game is fun, but even a little bitching about the frosting on your birthday cake will ruin your party.